The Motherhood Chronicles - VI

People say being a mother is a full time job – I beg to differ, it’s not just a full time job, it’s a full life job. Never has this been more evident to me than during the last stages of my pregnancy and now – after my delivery.

My mom has not been a person in the best of her health. Suffering from asthma, any work load greater than her normal day to day activities takes a severe toll on her. Of the few things she cherished in her life were her morning and evening walks, her afternoon nap and her freedom to do minimal cooking for dinner.

Then came along Nandu and the best laid plans went awry. Now 24 hours is too less for my mom. She get up at around 5 a.m., or lets put it another way, she doesn’t sleep at night – taking care of the baby – feeding her, rocking her to sleep, changing her…..she makes breakfast and lunch and is off to work by 7 am. She comes back and somehow there is always work to be done at home, which she does. The only luxury she has now is a 3-4 hour sleep (which is all she has in 24 hours) in the afternoon, which is also normally disturbed by the baby-related happenings in the house.

For someone who falls sick at a slight increase in activities, my mom seems to be in good health. But I know that it’s all appearances. She is reaching into the innermost recesses of her will power and gaining strength to carry, literally bringing up my kid in a way that inconveniences me the least and gives me time and strength to get on with my life.

For someone who kept saying that “people should take care of their own kids themselves and not let the grandparents do the caring”, her actions completely belie her beliefs. The amount of love, affection and care she has for the kid, I’m afraid even I won’t be able to compete.

Then there is the man behind the woman. My dad is like the silent unsung hero of a war. The amount of work my dad does behind the curtains is unbelievable. In fact it is only because of this unwavering wall of support that my mom can lean on, is she able to carry on. He cooks, runs all the errands for the house, takes care of the kid when mom & I are resting and then some, things that he was unable to do for me, he does for my kid.

When I see how I and my husband deal with each other and generally with life, I feel sorry for Nandu, for she will never experience the love and support that I have.