A Temple of Thoughts

Yesterday evening, I went to the temple. I have been on a month long trip abroad and it felt good to be back among the familiar smells and sights of the Ayyappa temple that I have taken to frequenting every Saturday, courtesy my husband. I am a not a particularly religious person, meaning I don’t go to temples often, I don’t perform pujas – heck! I even forget to light the lamp in front of the pictures of Gods that we have at home. I am far from applying sandalwood paste and vermillion to my forehead in religious reverence. But it felt good to be back.

I thanked the statue of Ayyappa for bringing me back safely, I told the small statuette of the Bhagawati, that she looked good and I was really happy to see Ganesha again. I told him “hi”, I asked about his well being, I did my usual 10 crosslegged salutations in front of him and then I was done. My temple ritual was over. I stood to a side allowing other, more reverent devotees to see the Gods.

While standing there I thought that this is like going to meet a friend. I recollected the joy I felt when I saw my dear friend in Chicago after almost 3 months. The feeling was almost the same. Before, she goads herself to believing that I am equating her to God (she anyway believes that she is God personified), let me clarify that it is the other way around. For me visiting the temple is not a religious activity, something you have to do to stay in the good books of God. It is like visiting a friend. Sometimes I have private conversations with God – I tell God about what’s bugging me, what went wrong and what went right. I thank God for the good things and don’t forget to blame him for the mis-happenings in my life. And then I say Bye & a C Ya without a promise as to when I we will meet again. I don’t expect God to do anything after I rave and rant to him / her. I just have a load off my chest when I get it all out. Now it no longer is my problem, its for God to worry about it.

It’s not as if I don’t think about God when I’m not at the temple. I think about God as often as I think about my parents and my friends. The only difference being that God being a resident of a different level, is not privy to modern communication systems and does not possess a telephone. That kind of makes a two way communication difficult but I communicate to God through my thoughts – it’s the purest form of communications, simply because we are not disciplined creatures, we don’t have control over our thoughts, we think all kind of bull shit and God is a party to all those musings – there is no secrecy and no deceit – it’s all pure and it’s all true.